Sitting in the VIP lounge of Dubai’s airport the other day I spotted the metro-tactical poster boy. This guy had it all, right down to the shaved head, goatee, American flag baseball hat, and Velcro splashed all over his khaki shirt. If you’re unsure what I’m talking about; that’s probably a good thing. If you’re “tracking”, than press on:
If you're back in the "civilized world", you might be a metro-tactical if:
- You believe that khaki is the new black.
- You're currently wearing more than one article of clothing made by 5.11 or Oakley
- You have a single dog-tag embedded in the laces of your boots.
- Your blood type is inked onto any piece of clothing. Extra credit if it’s tattooed.
- You're wearing a “riggers belt”
- You're wearing an ID card holder around your neck in the mall.
- You’re wearing an earth tone baseball hat with a subdued American flag on it. Extra points if you’ve sewn on “ranger eyes”
- You’re sporting Velcro
- Your keyring is made of 550 cord.
- Your backpack has a tag in the back that states “Insert Your Name Tag Here”.
- You can’t have a conversation without using the words “roger” or “copy”
- You're carrying your MNFI card prominently displayed in your wallet.
- If all of your t-shirts are black.
- You’ve contemplated the individual merits of black, OD green and khaki.
- You’re wearing dogtags.
- You know how much protein your last meal had. Extra credit if it came out of a blender.